Sunday, January 24, 2010

One step at a time

Sometimes I think about what Anna will be like as she grows up. What kind of person - toddler, adolescent, teenager, adult - will she be?

This weekend Traci & I took Anna to visit her great-grandparents (my paternal grandparents) in Virginia for the first time. On our flight home, we encountered a group of high school girls travelling back from D.C. to Chicago. The girls, all students at a local Catholic high school, had been to D.C. to participate in a pro-life march (evident by their matching sweatshirts). As they boarded the plane, they yammered & laughed like high school girls do. They shared gum & lip gloss, complimented each others' Uggs, and discussed the answers to problem number 89 from the weekend's math homework. Well, "they" did all of this with the exception of one girl. As they clammered onto the plane, one lone girl settled into a row by herself, against the window, while the other twelve girls crammed themselves together into four rows, three deep. As the plane pulled away from the gate and the girls fell into their conversations about all their high school dramas, the lone girl looked away & wiped her cheek. I looked away & wondered if she was drying a tear.

But, what does all of this have to do with Anna. Seeing this lone girl made me wonder ... will Anna be that girl? What if Anna is the fat girl with braces that the other kids make fun? What if Anna is the awkward girl with glasses & acne that no one talks to? What if Anna is that girl? If Anna were that girl, I hope that Traci & I are smart enough to realize and wise enough to instill in her the strength to hold on to her confidence.

What if, though, Anna is one of the other girls who makes fun of the fat girl or doesn't talk to the awkward girl? Then what? Oh, boy. One step at a time. Maybe I should just focus on the perfect four month old who's learning to roll over, blow spit bubbles, and developing an appreciation for board books at bedtime.

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